Feel Great · Get Well

Relationships after College: Now What?

Whether you’re a senior in denial or not, there are only three weeks left until graduation. You’ve probably been making a lot of life decisions about what cities you’d consider moving to or what type of post-grad job would suit you best.

However, if you’re anything like most of the people I know, the one decision that needs addressing is what will happen to your relationship after you throw your grad cap into the air.

I’m not a mind reader, but I’m positive that if you’ve tried to have a conversation regarding the topic with your significant other that ended with this simple sentence, “Let’s just enjoy our time now, and we can figure it out later.” Sure, that was great for a while. Unfortunately, ‘later’ is now, and the thought of figuring it out is still looming over your head.

This subject is one of the trickiest to navigate because even talking about it with your significant other can result in further problems. Everyone doesn’t want this time in his or her life to end, so talking about what a relationship would look like away from Syracuse University is scary. I speak from experience when I say that going into these conversations isn’t easy, and that ‘adulting’ really is hard. However, I’ll let you in on a secret; the key to these conversations is knowing what you want.

While the actual conversation itself is difficult, thinking long and hard about what you actually want from this relationship is harder.

If you thought about it and decided that it’s not going to work out in the future, then this conversation should be had so you and your partner can decide whether to cut it off now or wait another three weeks. This decision is completely fine, but it’s best not to string someone along until graduation and then blindside them right before their parents get here.

However, you might have made the decision to try and make it work. While this might be the more complicated option since there are logistics such as potential long distance and job situations that factor in, if you’re lucky enough to have a mature and stable relationship, anything can work.

When I think about it for my own situation, I know that things might get hard. I know that it might be difficult to do long distance. I know that it’s not going to be the same as living down the block from him. However, when you care about someone enough and know that there isn’t anyone else like them in the world, all of those potential issues seem to disappear.

So, the real question we all need to ask ourselves is, “How bad do I want this?” If your answer is something along the lines of what I said above, then it’s worth sticking around to see if that person could be the one. If your answer makes you wonder what else is out there and how things could be different for you without that person, then maybe it’s time to reevaluate your plans for next year.

Either way, I wish you the best of luck. This whole topic is definitely draining, but I have confidence that we all make the decisions that are best for ourselves.

By Courtney Rosser

Image courtesy of Thought Catalog