While perusing the latest posts on Thought Catalog, I came across one that stuck with me. Entitled “29 Worst Things About Being Female” by Alexandra Venema, Venema considers some of the issues that women face today that seemingly men don’t have to worry about. Her first reason, the “lack of camaraderie between women,” really stuck with me.
Why is it that men seem to have no issue being friends with each other while women just can’t? Competition seems to be the root of the problem here. Men, competitive by nature tend to keep it to sports. Do they get insecure about their appearances and/or body sometimes? Of course! However, that insecurity usually isn’t translated into treating their peers, or even their friends, like they’re less than they are. While with women, it’s typical to hear hateful comments on the regular that stem from jealousy, even among close friends.
From young ages, girls are taught that how much people like you and how successful you are in life is directly correlated to how good-looking you are. That reason alone is enough to figure out why so many women hate on other women just for being up to a certain standard of beauty. It’s not uncommon to hear girls ripping apart other girls verbally just for being pretty.
Now that I’m done pointing out the obvious, I’ll let you in on my concern. In a world so up-and-coming in the department of equal rights for women, women should be more open and forgiving with one another. When it comes down to problems such as being paid more or issues regarding sexism, men can’t and won’t understand what we’re going through. While they can be helpful in our pursuit, they aren’t the answer. If our goal is to be treated as equally as the men in our lives, we need to take a cue from them and the way they handle their relationships with each other.
Instead of hating on the woman who looks good in that dress you almost bought but didn’t, tell her she looks good in it. Making little steps such as this will definitely reduce some of the drama that our gender is known for. Some of the best relationships I have are with women and I know that if they were replaced with a man, while they might still be fulfilling and meaningful, they wouldn’t be as honest as they are right now. Women relate to women on levels that opposite sexes just can’t. Next time you find yourself letting jealousy ruin your perception you thought was nice regardless of your newfound insecurities, take a step back and realize that she probably has insecurities too and you wouldn’t want to be disliked for that. Again with golden rule, treat others as you want to be treated.
By Casie Popkin