Blog · Sex + Relationships


​So you broke up with your significant other and you’ve been a little down in the dumps.  We’ve all been there.  You have a feeling that you just can’t seem to shake.  It sits deep down in your stomach, lurking.  After a period of time, however, that feeling disappears.  You become strangely happy yet again.  Life feels great.

So now let’s let some more time pass.  You’ve moved on.  You’re happy with someone new.  Your phone rings and who is it…your ex.  Why are they calling now?  Why do they want to rekindle the fire now?  It feels like they knew you were happy and wanted to throw this confusing curveball at you for fun.  It’s like they have a radar on you.  The minute you forget about them and let it go they come right on back.  They try to wiggle their way right back into your heart by playing off of your happiness.  Telling you everything you want to hear.  They tell you everything that you used to love.

​Then there’s the other radar.  The one that goes off when you are vulnerable yet again.  The one that goes off when you have just ended things with someone else.  Your old ex knows just when to come back into your life.  Ever notice how you go through a different break up and within days your phone rings and it’s your ex?  They know all the right things to say and how to make you smile.  They know you need someone to listen and talk to.  They know what happened without you saying a word.

​So what is it?  There is no real radar attached to us — there isn’t some signal that gets transmitted to their cell phones.  What could it be?  Maybe it’s the original idea that your significant other can usually read you like a book.  Even though you aren’t together anymore doesn’t mean that the ability to read you goes away, it just isn’t used as much.  Even when they haven’t been your significant other in a while doesn’t mean that their senses about knowing you go away.  So while this radar can be frustrating and annoying, maybe it’s just a way of the person showing they still know you and still care.  While this isn’t always the case, sometimes it just might be.  Maybe this radar is trying to tell you something and maybe it isn’t, it’s up to your heart to decide.

By Samantha Breault


One thought on “Ex-Radar

  1. Love is the most incredible gift in the world, but the most fragile. We often don’t know if it’s true love, or just another romance to get us to “that one”. Too often our judgement is clouded by other things -friends, family, our busy schedules and our need to have a plan for the future. We forget that relationships are like the weather, there are stormy days, cold days, hot days and oppressive days. Relationships can come on like a light breeze on a Spring day and be refreshing, then become stormy like a fall thunderstorm and be unbearable. We just have to realize that the ups and downs are there to give us a true picture of the relationship. Sometimes that even includes a lull that allows us to step back and become clearer in our thinking. When that ex comes back into our lives we should be able to see clearer if they are a welcome breeze, or a fearsome storm. When it works – there is nothing better. In Love, like the weather, there is always something that you cannot predict you just need to appreciate the good days that get you through the tough ones. In the end, we all appreciate the good ones – the loves that make us smile the most.

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