You hear the words, “I like you,” but you hear a dreading tone along with them.
As you hold your breath, you hear the “but” that was bound to follow – along with some comical explanation as to why they cannot commit to you.
“I like you, but I need to focus on my sport.”
“I like you, but I just got out of a relationship.”
“I like you, but I don’t know how to balance a relationship with school and friends.”
“I like you, but my favorite NFL team is losing and I have to suffer with them. And also my dog ate my homework so…”
After hearing some of these “buts,” you can’t help but think – are you serious?
A lot of the time, these excuses come after you have spent irreplaceable time and effort on the other person. It’s like a low blow coming at you at 500 miles per hour. Let’s all be honest here: As much as we can say, “Oh, I’m fine,” after hearing these “buts,” we never are. We’re usually sent into a raging fit of emotion where we hate the opposite sex, then eat everything in sight, then are just left wondering: How can someone do this? Everything was going great.
These thoughts race through your head over and over, and you realize that what everyone is really looking for is not an, “I like you, but,” – but an, “I like you, so…”
An “I like you, so,” would go a little something like this: “I like you, so let’s take this a step further,” or, “I like you, so let’s be in a relationship.” All it takes is one switch of a word for the outcome to be completely different. So why is it so hard to get a “so” instead of a “but”? If it seems like every time “the talk” comes around that you’re leaving with a cryptic excuse and hurt feelings, know that once you find once you find the right person, the “so” will just come naturally. You shouldn’t even have to think twice.
Sometimes, you just have to get through all the “buts” to get to the “so” that you have (so) been waiting for. And as you wait for that “so,” you also learn things about yourself and what you want, so you will absolutely know when that “so” is right for you. Most importantly, as you wait and look for that special someone, have fun on the ride there – I know I am.
By Samantha Breault